Walk to Jog Combo

Two days ago I tried to use my workout video but my lovely and dear child of a two year old had stuck a gift card in the system so even though my video went in, it didn't play.  It did remove and so I placed it back in but it still didn't play and I didn't have as much success with the return.  I thought maybe Edgar had jammed the playstation full of CDs again but decided it best to leave it for Dusty to fix.  I did get upset over this as I really just wanted to exhaust some anxiety and not take a pill.  And I had no idea how Dusty had fixed this situation before so I just left it and with the extra built up anxiety pulled down the double bob stroller and decided a walk would work great.  But I wasn't just walking from one end of the street to the other like I usually would.  But instead I was going to walk around the entire block using the the new sidewalks that were just put in. 

Paylynn was really excited for this walk and Edgar was just as thrilled.  But little did any of us know that the walk would turn into a walk jog combination.  Oh my goodness I just got this sudden urge to take off with a slow jog.  I have never been able to run or jog my entire life.  I thought I could before my hips were fixed but really it was just a shuffle of a funny sort of fast walk.  I felt the anxiety melt away and my whole being rejoicing in just what has really been given to me.  I was just so greatful but was working up a workout so I couldn't rejoice in tears just at the moment in breaths of deep fresh air as it was a new kind of workout for me.  It was just so amazing. And yes I was praising God the whole time!  He is my All and Everything!

But when I got home I did facebook my overjoyous excitement in what I have never been able to do in my life.  It was wonderful to experience and not feel pain.  My hips didn't even give out.  They didn't hurt for once.  I have been able to walk on the treadmill at the Y and keep going back.  I don't have this plan that is brought down by debilitating pain of when will my hips not hurt or not give out.  I can actually stick to something that makes me feel good.  It is just such an awe of an experience.

Yes I did cry later that afternoon because it was beautiful to experience.  My surgeon, Dr. Millis, is such a great man who has used his gift that God gave him to heal someone like me.  He takes the time to really understand the patient and make them feel like a person not just another patient and move on to the next. He called my mother from his private cell phone to let her know that her daughter's surgery had went well.  God is in him.  If I could have, I would have been on a flight to Boston to give Dr. Millis the biggest hug with my eyes filled with such tears of joy.  Joy that I just can't express enough.  I really needed this.  The journey wasn't easy and the recovery was challenging with expected and unexpected events.  Yes I questioned and began to have such great doubt in God but suddenly I had to work at what I was losing with God.  And I never want to go down that path again. 

Yes God has a plan for me and I will always place my trust in Him.  As He knows me better then myself.  Sometimes I may not understand His plan but I am learning to place my full trust in Him.  

There has been great sorrow along this path He has planned for me and with the great sorrow there has been such great joy.  He fills me with His great mercies, love, compassion, sorrows, and joys.  He is my Everything.  Without Him I am nothing.  I am here to do His Holy Will.

My God and My All.  I trust in You.  And love You.